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Discussion Starter #1
Dear Mods

I am unsure if I am going about this the right way - I do feel a little bit like a child "telling on" somebody else. I'm not asking for a particular action; it's just an issue that I would like somebody else to be made aware of.

I'm sure most of you have seen this thread: http://www.bettafish.com/showthread.php?t=191945. I know I've seen a lot of mods comment on it, and I am very grateful to you guys for keeping the peace. What I want to say about it is that I feel it is a personal attack on a number of members, myself included, based on a couple of threads in which Stone has been quite aggressive. I know that nothing he has said in this particular thread is against the rules, and that he hasn't called us out by name, but it is a clear reference to several threads that Stone and I have been involved in in the past few days, specifically: http://www.bettafish.com/showthread.php?t=190665 and http://www.bettafish.com/showthread.php?t=182362. In both threads, I (and certain other members) have politely offered advice to another member based on a post they made either displaying their community tank, or stating their future plans for one. In both threads, I feel that Stone has responded with unnecessary aggression.

An example: in one post I wrote this: "You may have trouble there, Lizbeth. Hillstream loaches like cool (low 70s), fastmoving water, whereas bettas and gouramis prefer slow moving water in he high 70s. Gouramis and bettas are a risk to put together, as they may fight. Finally, platys prefer alkaline, hard water and all the other fish like soft acidic water." This was my response to a member's proposed stocking plan, as it mixed a number of incompatible fish, and I though it would be better to give her a heads up before she chose to do it. Further, by commenting there I hoped to help anyone who might be lurking on the forum considering stocking plans.
Stone responded with this: "wow the hillstream loach I have in my regular old 46 gal tank that is thriving needs a special tank? here is the problem with the internet, person (a) who knows little to nothing writes a post of their opinion no fact involved person (b) accepts it as fact and repeats often and even insists any other opinion is wrong, then that goes on to person (c) and on down the line until a bunch of people who know nothing treat it as fact.........I would love to see a published article from like a magazine on this, and no I wont accept something from someone named L337fisshkeeper007 on some random fish forum....... "
This was, I felt, unecessary - I do not present information without having researched it, and I was hurt that somebody would assume that. I thought it was especially unwarranted as the advice I was given was not even directed to Stone, did not offend the person it was directed at, and my civil response justifying my decision to offer advice was greeted with another mini-rant on how I was baselessly criticising with no stronger basis than my personal beliefs.

A kind of polarisation appears to have taken place: Stone, Russelltheshitzu Peachii and Kiara have grouped on one side. In general, I have nothing to complain of with Russell and Kiara, who, for the most part, are simply attempting to keep things on topic, and I rarely have a problem with Peachii. However, Stone's vitriol against LBF, myself and certain other members renders his current thread not only personalised, but hypocritical. His manner is frequently aggressive and his refusal to listen to any advice but his own makes it very difficult to continue a polite, helpful debate in any thread in which he chooses to get involved.

I apologise if my comments have derailed a thread in any way. I felt that it would be better to comment on the actual thread for several reasons: firstly, it would mean that others who are better researched (rather than merely holding stronger opinions) could comment; secondly, so that any lurkers who are looking at examples of community tanks would not simply assume that anything there would be appropriate; and thirdly, so that I would not appear to be privately harassing members by targeting them through private messaging where it would be nothing more than my opinion vs theirs.

I suppose a summary of what I want to say is this: I'm not trying to report or bring any action against Stone, but I would like moderators to be aware of his aggression and hypocrisy. I very much appreciate the job the mods do in keeping this forum friendly and happy, and long may it continue. :)

On a totally different and unrelated note: http://www.tropicalfishkeeping.com/freshwater-articles/water-hardness-ph-freshwater-aquarium-73276/. Hallyx pointed me to this amazing post by Byron on the mother-site, and I was wondering if it might be possible to sticky it to bettafish.com, as I don't think some members here understand pH and water hardness, and this is such a great resource.

Thank you very much for taking the time to read all of this.
Best regards
Bomba.
 

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Hi Bomba
Thank you for coming forward and discussing this topic with us.
Let me first assure you that the Mods that actually posted in these threads and myself are watching the behavior of ALL members in these threads you provided links to. It is not easy sometimes to reprimand one without reprimanding the other as heated arguments occur and both or all end up crossing the line. Opinions get very heated quickly. Some we don't see until they are reported. All I can suggest at this time is that you "report" a comment and not actually comment in the thread. Especially if you see 2 members arguing.... stay out of it yourself and report it using the report button.
Rest assured we are currently discussing this issue and all the members involved.

The stickies are being moved to a Reference Area on TFK but I will review it and see if we can add a copy of this to the new Bettafish Section. I believe BF will have a link or some area made to connect it once it is fully up and running. Thanks for the suggestion!
 
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Discussion Starter #3
Thank you very much for your reply, Jakie. :) I'm very sorry if what I wrote came across as criticism of the mods - I have a lot of respect for you guys and it definitely wasn't intended that way. Hope all of us involved in those threads aren't causing you guys too much of a headache!
 

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No problem!! No offence taken. I hope I didn't make you feel bad for asking. And Thank you for your understanding how intense the job of sorting out member's opinions and feelings can be. We're all welcome to have them, of course they are different, it is how they are said that is the problem. And written text can be interpreted differently when we are not in the heat of the argument ourselves... others are just over sensitive sometimes or don't even understand what sarcasm is. And then WE as Mods need to agree on the "transgression" and "punishment" and this takes time as we all have jobs and families and are in different time zones. It's challenging!
I'm off to work. Have a great day!
 
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