:) Don't be so hard on yourself. You'll never know if a novel is good enough to be published until you try. And try again. That book, The Help, by Kathryn Stockett? It was rejected like over 50 times. I think the actual number was closer to 90. And now it's a movie. I totally understand wanting to finish something before even thinking about publishing though. I feel the exact same way about my work too.
Hahahano, I'd like to get it finished and proofread before I even DREAM of trying to get anything published. And once I'm finished with it I might change my mind about publishing it, and instead just post it online somewhere because... I dunno, I don't think it's good enough to be a legit book?
Really awesome you're a writer. :) I veer towards fantasy because I have no experience in reality, haha. Although, I'm trying to branch out into playwriting now. Do you have a publisher lined up for your latest?