03-20-2009, 11:57 AM
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My fish story
I came across a journal entry I wrote back in 2002 about my first experience with fish keeping. Kinda makes me cringe to read now, but I thought it was kinda funny. If you're bored maybe it can serve as a bit of entertainment. Enjoy! I am very proud of myself. I haven't had a fish die on me in the last few weeks. Someone once asked me what the names were of all the fish in my tank. I told them, "That one is Hercules, or Bitch Fish. The rest I just call fish."
It is kind of hard not giving them all names, but if I ever need to get their attention I can always just yell, "Hey fish" or "buddy" or "sport." That always works.
I just feel that a fish needs to earn its name, and to do that it has to live over 6 months. That is why I only have one fish with a name (in fact, he has two names. So he should feel very special).
I have never had great luck with fish. In college I bought a Beta and immediately named him Richard. I wanted it to live in a Captain Morgan's bottle, only I hadn't quite finished the handle of Captain yet so he had to wait in a pickle jar for a few days. When it was finally time for him to swim over the threshold of his new home, he unexpectedly committed suicide. I was cleaning out his pickle jar when he jumped to his death, or the drain in the sink. I didn't even know he was depressed. I like to think that maybe he swam down that drain and made it all the way to the ocean, although I really doubt that's what happened. Also, he was a fresh water fish so swimming to the ocean wouldn't do him much good.
My friend Chad actually had a Beta he named Gibson that lived in a beer can for years. Just like a baby elephant, that thing was impossible to kill.
Over one Christmas break Chad was leaving town for a full month and he didn't think of what he was going to do with Gibson until he was on his way to the airport. At the last minute he asked his friend Seth to bring the fish to my house for the break.
Unfortunately for Gibson, Seth completely forgot. Anticipating the disappointment that would consume Chad when he returned from the break in January, Seth gave him a call and let him know that, "I'm sorry Chad, but your fish was dead when I went over to take it to Wes's. I had to flush it down the toilet."
Seth's plan was perfect. All he had to do was flush the dead fish before anyone ever realized it had been left unattended for a month. The only problem with his devious scheme, was that when he went to go dispose of poor Gibson he found the fish happily swimming around in his little beer can home. Apparently, fish do not need food to live.
For a few moments Seth stood there holding Gibson's tank and contemplating. There was a great inner struggle while Seth decided whether to let Chad know he had lied about going by to check on his fish, or whether to just flush a perfectly healthy Gibson to get rid of the evidence.
When Seth eventually looked at the tank and deep into Gibson's small beady eyes, he realized he just couldn't destroy a living creature's hopes and dreams even if it meant getting caught in his web of lies.
Gibson lived for over a year after his brush with death, but he never did go to college or get a job or anything. I'm sure Seth would have killed him had he known how little Gibson would do with his life. He was a very lazy fish.